Browsing Category

WildCopperMoon

Personal, WildCopperMoon

Why I Changed My Name…

Change happens. It is inevitable and healthy. It is a sign of personal growth.

That growth in my life has come in more than a few areas. In some, I’ve been blooming, coming into my own, finding my space and my people. I’ve been pruning too; gently clipping back time with those who don’t have my best interests at heart. Working on those little lazy habits that I’ve formed that leave me feeling inadequate and frustrated.

I’ve found myself deeply craving the company of radically inclusive women, true friends who share my morals, my ethics, my life view, who stand up for one another and refuse to ally themselves with judgemental and hurtful people. People who bring the magic out of me and not the madness. I started a Moon Circle with a dear friend, bringing together these wonderful creatures, where we hold space for one another and for ourselves. Where we explore who we are and how we feel outside of ‘just being a parent’. Where we have flower crowns and clay offering bowls and laughter and tears and candles and hand-holding and joy and intimacy.

I started the year feeling a little uninspired with MamaPixie, my business. The name was no longer sitting right with me and I couldn’t work out why. I worked with the brilliant Suzy Ashworth, completing one of her business coaching courses and found myself more focused on the message I wanted to share with others, what my voice is for and why I matter. After a run of… interesting challenges with work, this was very much needed!

I was struck, quite forcibly one day, by the realisation that my business name wasn’t working for me any more. It no longer reflected who I am, my message, my growth, the direction I want to nurture my business in. It was hard to let go of the MamaPixie name. I thought that it might feel like betraying why I started a business in the first place, but honestly? It made sense to change. I started off making children’s clothing and dressing-up items, moving into baby carriers and baby-wearing accessories, and now those just don’t reflect the deep draw I have to birth work.

It took me all of 48 hours to decide on my new name.

After deciding a name change was in order, I went to Whitby for a weekend alone for some healing after a challenging client that happened at the same time as a big personal situation. I hiked alone for hours along the coast, with no sound except my own breathing and the birds. I sat in the sea and contemplated my path, where I was choosing to expend my energy, what I want my future to look like. I did tarot on the beach with the waves crashing as my soundtrack. The fierce coastal winds blew away some cobwebs and filled me with fresh energies and enthusiasm. The solitude and silence, space to heal and to question, was divine. My longest spoken conversation for the entire weekend was with a bartender to decide what gin I wanted in my gloriously alone gin and tonic, which I drank whilst reading a new rupi kaur book and eating my body weight in halloumi cheese fries.

After Whitby, my family and I went to Greece for the wedding of two dear friends of ours. I was Best Woman to the Groom, a friend I have known over a decade, and it was so unbelievably special being part of their day. But the highlight wasn’t the traditional Greek bakery next door that we visited every morning for breakfast and their amazing pastries and bread, it wasn’t the freshly caught fish and calamari with my family, it wasn’t late-night homemade tzatziki with my new adopted Greek mother, it wasn’t the fact that weddings remind me of how much I love my husband (although *all* of those moments were truly wonderful).

It was swimming in the Aegean Sea.

I swam out so far that I could no longer feel the sand under my feet.
I swam so far out that I couldn’t hear the laughter and chatter from the beach.
I swam so far out that I was suspended in nothing but the ocean and my own connection to whatever energy you believes resides in the Universe.

And I just had this overwhelming feeling of joy and it bubbled over and I laughed and yelled “I’M IN THE AEGEAN SEA!” and just knew. I knew I was on the right path, on *my* path. I knew that I was strong and worthy and valuable and loved and loving and all those good feelings.

 

I’ve been riding that high for four weeks now. Four glorious weeks. Renewed energy and spark in all areas of my life, as a mother, as a wife, as a friend, as a doula…

I’d like to share that joy with you as I move forward into the next new and exciting evolution of my business, and myself…

 

A name that honours that no matter how much we plan, birth has a wild element to it. A powerful primalness that cannot be ignored and instead should be embraced, welcomed.

A name that draws on the traditional correspondences of copper as being connected to bringing the heart and mind together. Of energy conduction and healing.

A name that reflects the changes in our bodies and ourselves as we nurture life, both within and without ourselves. A reminder that this is all indeed ‘just a phase’.

birth, Doula, pregnancy, WildCopperMoon

Birthing Affirmations

I have always found that my mental state during pregnancy directly affects the births that I have. With my eldest, a negative and stressful pregnancy led to a similarly negative birth experience. Being in a much more joyful, strong place whilst pregnant with my eldest daughter resulted in a thrilling and happy (if not-to-plan!) birth. And then I have spoken often of the transformative power of birth that I experienced in my last labour.

Equally, I had wonderful light and support coming from others. My husband, Stephen, lifted me every day. My doula, Hannah, held my hands and listened as I made plans. My friends came together to celebrate the unborn life and my steps towards the birth at my mother blessing, complete with cake-stealing cat, henna, and a rather gorgeous crown!

I also created a birthing altar, a place in my home that was brimful of good vibes. I collected together birth related art, both prints and done by friends. My husband kept me well supplied in fresh flowers and candles. Quite simply, the act of surrounding myself with this positive imagery had a beneficial effect on my mindset.

I first realised the power that imagery has on us when I was a little girl reading Roald Dahl’s childhood autobiography, Boy. In it, he talks about how when his mother was in the last three months of her pregnancies, his father would announce that “the glorious walks” would begin. He would take her to places of great natural beauty, confident that the stunning surroundings was directly influencing his unborn child, filling them with joy and love and an appreciation for the world.

With that in mind, I had particular phrases I used to meditate on during pregnancy. Little affirmations to repeat over and over, like a mantra.

I am strong enough.

I am good enough.

One breath at a time - LR WM

The words we choose to use in pregnancy, and throughout our lives, can hugely affect us. If you constantly tell yourself that you are (insert whatever negative label you might lean towards using here), then that is how you’re going to feel. We are constantly bombarded with this overwhelming barrage of images of birth being hard and painful, filled with screaming and blood, which I am sure directly correlates to the amount of women who feel petrified heading into birth. One Born Every Minute has a lot to answer for.

Imagine if we approached our first births having only ever been told that women are strong, that birth is transformative, that you can trust your body and your instincts, completely confident in the knowledge that you WILL be listened to and respected throughout the entire process. Imagine if most births in the media were portrayed as active, moving around the birthing space, swaying and breathing, accompanied cow-type lowing, natural and uninterrupted. We would be in so much of a better place to bring another life into this world.

As a doula, I’ve seen first hand the incredible impact that positive language and imagery can have on a pregnancy.

A good example is the use of the word ‘contractions’. It brings imagery of tightness, closing up. It’s a tense word. Replace that with surges or waves and the images that come to mind are so very different. Waves brings beaches, that wave of intensity moving up and over your body, consuming you, and then washing away.

How about the word ‘labour’? It gives a feeling of hard work and toil, exhaustion. Using ‘birthing’ instead feels much more active, and yet feels softer in the mouth, softer in the body than ‘labour’.

It is so important to remember the power these words have during our pregnancies and births, and I found myself thinking a lot about designing my own set of birth affirmation cards. So I did!

I drew on my own birth experiences with my three children, as well as the births I have attended as a doula, and with lots of discussion with friends about what phrases and words they found inspiring, calming, and positive in their own journeys.

Within a mid-green and golden yellow colour scheme, each one has a different positive birth affirmation on it. These were originally designed for Michelle, a mother blessing client of mine, and the main focus of this set is fear release and actively acknowledging and letting go of what has been (perhaps a negative birth experience previously), and moving forward into light and trust, with quiet, shining confidence.

The idea that a pregnant person is seeing these strong, affirming words over and over in through their day, even if they’re not *actively* seeing them, those words are gently sinking into the psyche to rest in the subconscious.

This is just the first finished set, and I have another two in different colours and themes, with differing focuses in progress. Eventually, some of these affirmations will be available as art prints too, which I am super excited about!

Etsy Listing triptych - LR WM

The affirmations included in this particular set are;

– Birth is safe for me and my baby
– Each surge brings my baby closer to me
– I am awake. I am aware. I am unafraid.
– I am so strong
– I release my fear
– I trust birth
– I will give this birth everything I have. Nothing holds me back.
– It is safe for me to be happy during this pregnancy
– My breaths are long, slow, and relaxed
– One breath at a time

Ultimately, you can’t control something which has so much of a Wild aspect to it like birth naturally does. What you CAN do is bring positivity, reminders of strength, and encourage that trust in yourself and your instincts to your pregnancy, putting yourself in the best position possible to move into the final stages of bringing your baby earthside.

You can purchase a set from my Etsy store right here!